Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Mother knows best!


I read this article today and it spoke to me....if you are so inclined read it and let me know what you think.

Due to baby boy's prematurity he qualifies for all sorts of specialists to come to our home and help him. One day the speech therapist heard my 3 year old daughter speak and informed me she was WAY behind and needed to be enrolled in a specialized preschool that is 4 days a week either half or full day depending on what they determine her severity is.

I recognize she is behind in speech and I am all for speech therapy and think preschool is great....but that seems excessive for my 3 year old. I don't know that taking her away from me that many hours a week is going to improve her speech. There are so many other things that she needs to learn at home more than she needs intense intervention for speech. She needs to be home and play with her baby brother whom she adores, she needs to sit at the table and play pink and purple playdoh for hours, she needs to "play tea" with Mommy and read story after story after story. She will miss out on that if she is gone from home for hours a day. I am currently looking into getting her therapy a couple of times a week for an hour at a time. I do believe a parents job is to prepare their children for success in life and communicating properly is part of that preparation.


I realize there are children who need intense intervention and who benefit greatly and I think that is necessary . Every family and child is different...I am not saying my choice is a blanket statement for all. But for my sweet girl and for my family I am certain this is a correct decision in spite of the "experts" telling me different. I am standing up as the expert on my daughter and saying NO to her being away from me for that long! As Moms we have the responsiblity to make decisions for our children that the "experts" may criticize and do not understand. But if we do it under the direction of the spirit and follow our instinct we are following our God given gift as Mothers.

Friday, April 15, 2011

You-Me


Tonight my husband took my 3 older boys (ages 12 in 3 weeks,10 and nearly 6) to a scout campout. So it was just me and my little ones (ages 3 and 1 next week) tonight.

My 3 year old LOVES to play with play-doh. She will play with it for HOURS. But the stuff we have is pretty dried out and yucky. So I told her if she did #2 in the potty (having some issues there...my kids have troubles...ugh) I would buy her some pink and purple play-doh. Today she came running out jumping up and down and clapping..."Me did poop on potty!" She proceeded to come grab my hand and lead me there to see her accomplishment (I may or may not have jumped up and down and clapped as well!)

After we got the older boys and Daddy off, we made our way to Target to buy the purple and pink play-doh. On the way we were talking about it and I asked if I could play with it. She said in her cutest and most enthusiastic 3 year old voice, "YES! You-Me are Buddies!" Completely melted my heart it was so darn cute.

So we proceeded to play play-doh for quite a while. Fortunately little brother was content in his high chair for a bit to allow this. When he got restless, I got him out and played on the floor with him and oh man is he ever cute! He wriggled away from me several times when trying to change his diaper and get pajamas on (is there anything cuter than a baby tush?). He has now learned that when I say, "I'm gonna get you!" that it's a game and he will crawl away from me. Most of the time he stops and looks back because he wants me to get him because then the fun begins. The tickling, the raspberries on the tummy and the silly songs.


It was such a fun night with my two little ones. I am so grateful for these moments to create memories not just for them, but for me (okay maybe MORE for me!). Fills my "mommy bucket" so on hard days there is more to draw from when my bucket gets drained a bit.

I love my job and the "bonuses" that come with it! I am grateful to be "buddies" with my sweet girl....I must be doing just enough right as a Mommy for her to consider me so :)
I am heading over to Field Day for a bit....my son informed me he REALLY REALLY wanted me there. So I am going over for about an hour. Just thought you would like to know :)

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Expectations....

(I have always thought a Mom should grow an extra arm for every child born after 2)

I was having a conversation the other day with a good friend. She asked if I were going to Field Day this Friday. I said I hadn't really thought about it and would just have to play it by ear this year due to a baby with severe allergies/asthma. If it is windy he can't be outside.

This friend has 6 children and is amazing! She was talking about how she would need to be at the school ALL DAY long to watch the kids because 1st and 2nd grade are in the morning and 3-5th grades are in the afternoon. She was feeling the Mommy guilt for not being there the entire time because of an 8 month old baby who would need to eat/nap etc.

I think that our kids are overloaded with activities/sports/lessons etc.... BUT SO ARE MOMMIES! The expectations put on Moms to be at every minute of every activity is unrealistic!Not to mention society telling us we have to be "more than a Mom" to have any worth (another post for another time) The more children you have the more unrealistic it becomes, especially when they range in age so vastly (mine range from 1-12).

My Mother NEVER attended Field Day to watch me play water games/relay races etc.... I think I turned out okay. I don't recall my Mom helping out in my classroom or being the PTA President and I am not scarred by it. She was there for me on a daily basis when I got home from school, when I needed help with homework, when we had family dinner etc....

I think it's wonderful to go into my children's classroom. I LOVE how their little eyes light up when you walk in and how much they LOVE having Mommy there. However I also have 2 little ones at home and I can't go very regularly and that is OKAY. It's a season of life....I am still involved in my kids education and know what they are doing, I know their teachers, I communicate regularly with them.

I TRY to be at everything I can I go to awards assemblies, pack meetings for Cub Scouts, baseball games etc... I know how important it is for my children to feel like I am supporting them and interested in what they are doing. I want them to know that I love them and think they are wonderful. However Field Day is a day where they PLAY games. It's not really an accomplishment they have achieved...even if they do receive a RIBBON for playing GAMES (I have issues with getting a trophy/ribbon for JUST SHOWING UP...let's reward mediocrity...but that's a whole different post).


Contrast Field Day with this example...My oldest is going to be in his school production of "The Wizard of Oz" and has a minor lead in it. He has worked for HOURS in rehearsals, memorizing the story, lines etc. He is very excited about it and his performance will be a GREAT accomplishment. Getting up in front of people is not easy for him, so think of the lessons he will learn in doing it. It will be something hard for him that he overcomes. You can bet that I will be at every peformance I can to show him how proud of him I am.

When I am stretched too thin and trying to do too much I am over stressed, crazy Mom. When I am focused on keeping our home running smoothly, keeping my baby on a schedule so he eats/sleeps when he needs to all of us are happier.

Maybe I need to learn how to stretch further...what do you think? Do you think Moms/Dads need to be at EVERYTHING their kids do or is it okay to prioritize? Is it okay to simplify and get down to bare basics? How do you support your kids and let them know how important they are??

Monday, April 11, 2011

Remembering a year ago....

Fresh in my mind...trying to be on bedrest with four children.

Feeling guilt that I couldn't get down and play with my kids, couldn't go to the school for an awards assembly, couldn't walk upstairs to tuck them into bed.

Feeling guilt that so much was put upon my husband, he worked all day and then came home and had to clean up all the messes that come when Mom isn't available.

So very grateful for a kind, loving husband who bore the burden amazingly well.

Taking my blood pressure obsessively and thinking that darn thing must be broken because certainly my blood pressure wasn't 168/99. It wasn't broken.

Looking up on Web MD to find out more pre-eclampsia and having it scare the living daylights out of me. Women die...it is unpredictable and scary.

Feeling so grateful for a conscientious, caring doctor who made decisions that were in my best interest, even though I didn't like them sometimes

Friends showing up at my doorstep to clean my seriously neglected bathrooms. I was so embarrassed....but so grateful I shed tears.

More friends came and got my laundry and washed/dried, folded and brought it back and put it away. Again so grateful I cried.

And yet more came and brought dinners, watched my children and came and visited me so I didn't feel so isolated and lonely.

It made me understand the Atonement better. I could not do it for myself, but another who could stepped in and did it for me out of selflesness and pure love.

And again today I am so very grateful and shedding tears as I Remember.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Joseph Smith: The Prophet of the Restoration



I love this movie produced by the LDS church about Joseph Smith. It is a fabulous production and a very intriguing movie about an amazing man.

However it is more than entertainment. It depicts events that I know happened and restored Christ's true church to the earth. I am so grateful for Joseph Smith and his courage for fulfilling his mission on this earth in spite of everything he endured.

The truths he restored give me hope and give me guidance in this crazy world. They give me guidance and clear direction. It gives me knowledge about who God is and his character. I know he is a loving Father who knows me personally, answers my prayers and is involved in my life.

The Book of Mormon is one of my greatest treasures and has given me greater knowledge of my Savior Jesus Christ and the doctrines of his gospel. I will be forever grateful to Joseph Smith who translated this book by the power of God.

I know the world questions Joseph's experiences and does not believe God could appear to a young 14 year old boy. Honestly it would have been easier for Joseph to deny his experiences and move on with life. It would have saved him much heartache and physical pain. It would have saved his life which was cut short at age 38, but in his words:

" I had actually seen a light, and in the midst of that light I saw two Personages, and they did in reality speak to me; and though I was hated and persecuted for saying that I had seen a vision, yet it was true; and while they were persecuting me, reviling me, and speaking all manner of evil against me falsely for so saying, I was led to say in my heart: Why persecute me for telling the truth? I have actually seen a vision; and who am I that I can withstand God, or why does the world think to make me deny what I have actually seen? For I had seen a vision; I knew it, and I knew that God knew it, and I could not deny it, neither dared I do it; at least I knew that by so doing I would offend God, and come under condemnation."

I will be eternally grateful that he did not deny it and went forward with courage and conviction.

Friday, April 1, 2011

One year ago...


I was pregnant with our 5th baby, I was 30 weeks. On this very day I was put on strict bedrest due to preeclampsia...and no it wasn't an April Fool's joke. I am having many emotions as I think back to that very difficult time. I will probably be doing many posts about this time in our lives. It was perhaps the biggest trial I have gone through, yet the growth I experienced because of it was priceless. My relationship with my Heavenly Father and Savior grew immensely and I honestly wouldn't trade it for anything...seriously look at that face...worth every painful, scary moment!

Here is a quote I just found and resonated with me the second I read it.... "Adversity has the effect of eliciting talents, which in prosperous circumstances would have lain dormant." -Horace-

I agree completely with the quote, but you have to have an open heart and allow yourself to glean those talents and not harden your heart and be bitter in adversity in order to change and grow.

More to come throughout the month...what talents/abilities have you found in adversity?