Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Giving wings....

(isn't he handsome?)

My oldest turns 12 in about 6 weeks. It is making me all melancholy and sappy...on Sunday I tried putting my arm around him during church and he shook it off (first time he's ever done that, he is my affectionate boy) making me even more emotional.

In our church 12 year old boys are ordained to the Aaronic Priesthood as a deacon. Having that priesthood is a big deal, it gives them all sorts of responsibilities and such. My son will pass the sacrament, which is an ordinance we consider to be sacred and holy, to members of our congregation. The fact that my son will receive that priesthood just signifies to me that he is getting older and it seems like him leaving the nest is in the very near future. He goes to Scout Camp this summer for an entire week...without ME! I think I will be a nervous wreck. A friend of mine assured me he will come home a different kid....I don't think I want a different kid, I want him how he is. He is sweet and helpful and obedient. However I know he has to grow up.

I hate that our job as Moms from the moment those sweet babies exit the womb is to teach them not to need us any longer. Think about it...we teach them they don't need to sleep with Mom and Dad, we wean them from getting nourishment from us, we teach them to walk so they don't need us to carry them, we teach them how to get dressed, put on their shoes, make their own food etc..etc..etc... All in an effort to train them to be independent souls. It is heartbreaking and liberating all at the same time. I see those young adults who weren't given the strong enough wings to exit the nest and I know I don't want my kids to be those....so I will buck up and teach him and make him dohard things and help him grow up. Even if I still want him to be that sweet, chubby faced toddler who would run up to me every morning saying "I ayake Mom...Good norning!" (just typing that made me tear up fyi)

7 comments:

Lynnette and Paul said...

So true....they grow up way too fast and it is not fair! I wish they could stay under "our wings" forever :) I cannot believe he is going to be 12!!! He is such a good amazing boy, always has been, and a big part of that is because he has such a great set of parents that have raised him well.

Jen said...

It IS hard. Just last night Trever fell asleep on my chest and he was just so sweet and peaceful and I wondered why they had to get bigger and crawl away and then walk or run away, and then grow and find a million reasons to think they are too grown to need you. I do want to raise independant children, but it is difficult sometimes. Perhaps those are just Mommy growing pains? I too have thought about how quickly it will probably go from here. (Some days I wouldn't mind fast forwarding to when Brenden has teenagers of his own... LOL) He will be old enough to serve a mission in just over 6 years! I guess having one so much older does make me cling on to my baby and wish he'd just stay small and sweet and snuggly.

Cheryl said...

I probably feel this way even more so because my sister and her family were here yesterday and my nephew is leaving on a mission the middle of May. I so remember that big 6'1" boy as a baby and as a 12 yr old etc.... My sisters say from the time they become a deacon until the time they leave the nest happens in the blink of an eye!

Laura@livingabigstory said...

What a sweet post! At least 1x/week I make my 8 y/o say, "I promise I will still hug you when I'm a teenager." He always laughs and says I'm crazy to imagine he won't. But I know there'll be a day when it's more for me than for him :(

Wendi said...

Lance turned 12 on Monday. He'll be going to the General Priesthood Meeting with John on Saturday. And the deacon's quorum presidency came over on Sunday to teach him how to pass the sacrament. It's hard for me to believe that my baby is already 12. He's such a sensitive kid and I worry for him when he serves a mission someday, but I know the Lord will take care of him. He still hugs me several times each day and I love it. I know I need to teach him to be tough and independent, but I hope he'll always stay sweet and loving as well.

Cardalls said...

Nathan is going with Dave on Saturday too even though he is 6 weeks away...he really wants to go!

Sarah said...

It is hard for me to watch my kids grow up! Megan seems to have suddenly developed this separate life away from us. It seems like every weekend she is getting invited to do things with her friends. I know she is loving it, but I don't like to let her go! Sniff....